I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
