Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
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