i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
Drake has all the answers
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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