I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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