ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Randomize