PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
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