I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize
