You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Randomize