you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
A bitchslap is in order.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
