She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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