Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
It's never too late to be topless.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
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