I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
Dear god my vagina.
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
Randomize
