hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Randomize