it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
