More tranny stories later!
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
