I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Randomize
