He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Randomize
