come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
