you guys were way drunker than both of me
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
