is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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