Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
