Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
