best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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