dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
