Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
