I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Randomize
