You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Such a big mess for such a small penis
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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