she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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