what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
