shes about as inviting as chlamydia
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
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