help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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