i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Randomize
