I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
