Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
