I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
