Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
