thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
