would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
