Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Randomize
