You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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