On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize