woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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