yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
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