he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
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