So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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