our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
