That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"