I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
