Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
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