Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
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